4 Times Jim Tried to Propose
by time4moxie
Summary: ...and the one time he actually did.  Even when he's got the girl, sometimes Jim finds himself being laughed at by the Fates....
1. Labor Day Weekend

Jim knew he was jumping the gun. They'd barely been dating six weeks when he bought The Ring. He bought it the day before the Fourth of July, mere hours before picking Pam up to attend his family's big summertime event. He didn't tell anyone about the second largest purchase of his life. (He still couldn't believe this ring cost more than his old Corolla, even if he had bought the car second-hand) He knew everyone would think he was rushing things. But it was perfect - nearly as perfect as she was.

So he bought a symbol of his permanent attachment to her, on the day before the national holiday celebrating independence. He thought the irony was appropriate, because since they'd finally gotten things right, he never felt freer. This was what he had wanted for so long, and damn it if he wasn't going to make sure he finally got it. So he purchased The Ring, tucked it safely away, and celebrated the holiday with his family and his girl, a mysterious little smile appearing every now and then, knowing he just needed the right moment.

The summer wore on, and Jim found himself looking at that ring at nearly every opportunity. As the weeks went by, and their relationship continued to thrive, he spent nearly every free moment brainstorming original ways to propose to her. It didn't have to be grand. In fact he knew her well enough to believe she would probably appreciate it more if he didn't do something that would embarrass her in front of crowd. It should be a quiet but heartfelt gesture, a moment shared between just him and her, in a place they'd remember all their lives. A perfect moment they would both look back on fondly. It didn't seem like much to ask. As autumn approached, Jim thought maybe his chance had finally arrived.

For years Pam's family rented cabins at Lake Henry for the Labor Day weekend, and this time was particularly special in that both of Pam's sisters would be attending. The Beesly girls hadn't shared a holiday at the lake together since Emily graduated from high school some five years ago. With Pam's elaborate descriptions of the stunning sunsets over the mountains, and her whispered promises of stealing him away for afternoons alone on a blanket in the woods, Jim carefully packed The Ring and waited for his chance.

Meeting Pam's sisters was as much fun as Jim had expected. Juliet, the oldest, was a married librarian who arrived with her husband Phillip and their two young children, Stephen and Jon. Emily was the youngest, still finishing up college and working toward becoming a music teacher. She brought along her boyfriend Benjamin, and he and Jim seemed to click immediately, perhaps both aware that they were the only ones not quite yet family, though certainly never treated as anything but.

Jim could see so many similarities between Juliet, Pam, and Emily almost immediately, even if he did think that Pam was noticeably prettier, slightly smarter, and definitely the one with the sharpest sense of humor. He could imagine what their daughters might be like just by watching Pam interact with her sisters.

Come Sunday evening, Pam and Jim were sitting on a wooden swing that overlooked the lake, his arm snugly around her shoulders, enjoying the view and the peace that came from Juliet's children being somewhere on the other side of the property.

"I hope spending this weekend with my crazy family hasn't scared you away," Pam joked, resting her head against his shoulder.

"I'm still here, aren't I?"

"Well, we drove up in my car, so you are kinda stuck. I was thinking more about when we get back to civilization tomorrow night."

Jim hugged her a little tighter. "Nah, I'm afraid you haven't rid yourself of me that easily."

"Good," she smiled. They sat in comfortable silence for a while, watching the occasional jet skier make their way across the lake.

"This is probably the best summer I've had in a long time," Pam said.

"Me, too. Definitely beats last year."

"Don't even go there," she warned. "Last summer has been stricken from my memory."

"Fair enough," he nodded. "As long as we learned something, I guess."

"I know I did."

"What did you learn?"

"I learned that it sucks being without you."

He laughed softly. "What a coincidence. I learned the same exact thing."

She wrapped her arms around him. "See, it's fate. We are meant to be together."

As they sat there, the bench gently swaying, it occurred to him that now was the time. He kissed her forehead. "Sit tight," he told her. "I'll be right back."

Jim wasted little time in finding The Ring in the hidden compartment of his suitcase, stopping only to take a deep breath and try to think of what in the world he was actually going to say to her. He'd been waiting so long it seemed like he'd automatically know what to say, but now that the time had arrived he was forgetting all the words he'd practiced. He was forgetting his own name, to be honest. The realization was dawning that he was about to change everything. Forever. He took another deep breath and headed back out. Everything would be just fine.

As he approached the swing he saw that Pam was no longer sitting alone. Her sister Emily had joined her, and the two were hugging enthusiastically.

"Hey," he greeted them, hoping Emily would soon be on her way elsewhere.

"Oh my God, Jim," Pam exclaimed, "Ben just proposed to Emily! And she said yes!"

"Wow, that's great," Jim replied, feeling more than a bit deflated. No wonder he and Benjamin had hit it off so well. They both had arrived with similar agendas. But in no mood to steal the spotlight, Jim knew that his chance was just going to have to wait.


	2. Autumn DM Employee Appreciation Night

The air was already filled with the smell of a bonfire when Jim and Pam arrived at the farm. Michael had arranged for a Dunder Mifflin employee appreciation night, complete with pumpkin picking, corn mazes, hay rides and a pig roast, and for once Jim and Pam had hopes it might actually be fun.

Pam grabbed her scarf from the back seat of Jim's car, as it was slightly colder than normal for an early October afternoon. "You up to working your way through the corn maze with me later?" She asked, linking her arm through his.

"I could be talked into it," he mused, adjusting the collar of his coat as they started walking toward the large barn ahead of them. "Maybe I'll get you lost on purpose in there."

"I wouldn't complain," she smiled. "Though Dwight might take it upon himself to track us down."

"Shhh," he chided. "He does not need to know."

There were many things Jim didn't think Dwight needed to know, and his plan for this evening was certainly one of them. As his arm swung against the front of his corduroy jacket, he could feel the weight of the small black box buried deep in his inside pocket. He'd decided this morning that tonight would be the night he would try again to ask Pam to marry him.

He was the first to admit that attempting such a thing at an office-related event seemed like a bad idea. But Pam had been so delighted at the thought of the hayride and the pumpkin picking that he didn't see how he could waste such a good opportunity. Besides, Halloween had always kind of felt like their holiday. He just needed to seize the chance to be alone with her at some point.

They met up with Phyllis and Bob in the marquee set up next to the barn, and sipped hot apple cider as they watched Michael try to talk the farmer into letting him drive the horses. Thankfully the farmer said no, and as they bounced along on the back of the cart Jim made sure that Pam stayed on his side that wasn't hiding the ring. They were knocked together so much on the journey that handled any other way, his surprise would surely have been revealed. It was also a pleasant excuse to keep his arm tightly around her.

He happily followed her around the pumpkin patch, amused with how seriously Pam took her job in finding the perfect pumpkin. They walked the lines of vined pumpkins for nearly thirty minutes.

"You know they could leave us behind," Jim teased her.

"They won't." She replied. "It takes time to find the right pumpkin."

"Do describe this wonder to me. What exactly are you looking for?"

"I'll know it when I see it."

"I hope so. I'd hate to miss the corn maze because you overlooked your perfect pumpkin."

"Oh hush. Don't be such a complainer."

"I'm not complaining. I just find it amazing that it takes you more than a half hour to pick out a pumpkin."

"Aha, this is it," she declared proudly, lifting up a large round pumpkin that looked to Jim very much like the last fifty pumpkins he'd seen. "I told you I'd find it."

The look of pure satisfaction on Pam's face made Jim unable to do anything but shake his head and smile, his heart practically bursting with love. There really wasn't anyone else in the world quite like her.

"Here, let me carry it," he said, taking the heavy pumpkin out of her hands. "Can we go back now?"

She grabbed his sleeve. "No, wait a minute."

Jim turned back toward her. "Hmm?"

He nearly dropped the pumpkin as Pam launched herself at him, wrapping her arms around his neck and planting a warm kiss firmly on his lips.

"Thanks for being so great," she said breathlessly. "Do you know how much I love you for putting up with me?"

"You're insane," he laughed, flushing at her compliment and affection. "So I expect it's a great deal."

He grabbed her hand with his free one, and pulled her toward the approaching hay wagon. "Come on, Pumpkin Whisperer."

Jim gently deposited Pam's prized pumpkin into the trunk of his car and they finally headed toward the corn maze. The sun was starting to drop lower in the sky, and Jim felt a bit of tension building as he knew they shut the maze at sundown. It didn't help his nerves any that Michael and Dwight had also chosen that moment to give it a try too.

"Hey, Jim!" Michael greeted the duo. "Let's race - I bet you and Pam can't make it through this quicker than Dwight and I can."

Jim was about to decline when he had an idea. He winked at Pam before turning to Michael. "That's a great idea actually, Michael. Who's got a stopwatch?"

"I do, of course," Dwight scoffed. "I always have one with me."

"Of course you do, Dwight," Jim grinned. "Okay, well, you guys start first, and we'll wait three minutes and then we'll start."

"Why three minutes?" Dwight asked suspiciously.

"Shh," Michael nudged him. "That way we get a head start." He looked at Jim and Pam. "Okay then - we're off!" Michael darted into the cornfield, with Dwight close behind.

"You're horrible," Pam laughed.

"You'd rather walk through with those two?"

"Good point," she smiled, extending her hand. "Shall we head in whatever direction we don't hear them?"

"Absolutely."

They spent the first minutes trying to lose themselves down the aisles of corn, pausing at intersections to listen for familiar voices, then choosing the paths that led away from them. The maze was impressively large, and soon they could hear nothing but the sound of their own footsteps crunching on the hay and fallen stalks. They turned down one path and found themselves at a dead end.

"Finally," Pam sighed, turning toward Jim. He raised his eyebrows at her comment, and she responded by pulling his coat lapels toward her, stepping up on tiptoes to kiss him. "I have been waiting all day for this," she sighed against his lips.

"Waiting for what?" he asked, his arms coming around her.

She unzipped his coat and pushed it open, her fingers immediately working on unbuttoning his shirt. "You and me, alone in cornfield," she mused, "who's to know what will happen? Clothes fall off all the time."

This was not what Jim was expecting. And on any other day, he would have been delighted by her boldness. But all he could think about was the ring in his pocket, and how he couldn't imagine this as the type of proposal story he'd one day be telling his children and grandchildren.

"What has gotten into you?" Jim laughed, his hands covering hers to stop the undressing she was so evidently focused on. "Is corn an aphrodisiac I didn't know about?"

"I guess being out here alone with you just makes me want to get back to nature." When she reached for his belt, he stopped her again. "Don't you want to?" She asked.

Not want to make love the woman he adored? Was that a serious question? "I just think it's getting a little late in the afternoon," he found himself saying, aware of how lame it sounded. "They are going to kick us out at sunset, you know."

"You're afraid we'll get caught," she teased.

"Yeah," he lied. "I don't think I'd recover from having Stanley turning the corner and finding us." He brushed his hand against her cheek. He was losing confidence in his ability to turn the situation around. What could he say? Sorry, Pam - I'm a bit too distracted thinking about how to propose to you to have sex right now. He knew she was staring up at him, clearly wondering what was going on with him, so he did the only thing that seemed safe. He began kissing her.

It was a compromise that seemed to sit well with Pam, and as the minutes ticked by, Jim started to feel like maybe this could still work. He could still do this. He pulled back to look at her again, and took a deep breath.

"Pam," he finally said.

Before he could speak another word, the voices of Michael and Dwight could both clearly be heard calling out. Calling out for Pam and Jim.

"Damn it," Jim sighed, closing his eyes as he rolled his head back.

"I guess we better get back before they start stomping down new paths in the corn," Pam grinned.

He nodded, frustration preventing him from speaking.

Pam immediately noticed his quietness. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah," he replied sullenly, his hand at her back as they made their way out of the maze. "Those guys just have the worst timing."


	3. Lighting of the Christmas Trees

Jim had put the ring away. He thought that two foiled attempts at a proposal was probably some sort of cosmic sign that he was trying too hard, pushing for too much too fast. Deep down, he knew there was some truth to it. He'd spent so much time wanting her that part of him couldn't tear himself away from running straight to the finish line: to marry her, to spend the rest of his life with her, with a legal right to look after her, and one for her to take care of him. It sounded as cheesy as all hell, he knew. But it was what he wanted, and it was hard to not want it all Right Now.

He knew he already had so much to enjoy. So he spent time focusing on what they already had. Things between him and Pam were perfect in their own way. They woke up together each morning and fell asleep in each other's arms every night. There was plenty of laughter, late night talks about future plans, and the occasional heated disagreement that almost always seemed worth the strife when the time came to make up again. Jim knew that being engaged wouldn't change much on a daily basis anyway.

There would then be a wedding to plan, of course - but Pam was doing that now anyway, sort of. As Emily's Maid of Honor (Juliet was Matron of Honor), Pam started carrying around bridal magazines, catering menus, and lists of things to do. So many things to do. He was actually kind of surprised how quickly Pam had fallen back into the arena of wedding planning.

"I guess it's different when the wedding you're planning is for someone else," she shrugged as she tried to explain her enthusiasm one evening. They were sitting on the living room floor, with clippings of bridesmaid dresses strewn across the coffee table. She leaned against him giving him a glance that almost looked shy. "Or maybe I'm starting to believe in the whole institution again."

He carried her comment in his heart as October turned into November. As the signs of the holiday season approached, he started thinking about proposing again. He couldn't help himself. This was the most romantic time of the year, wasn't it? It seemed especially so since this was the first time they would be able to share the holidays as a couple. He knew Pam was a kid at Christmastime, and with her at his side it seemed certain this was going to be his best holiday ever.

"So did you sign us up for Breakfast with Santa yet?" Jim teased her one morning, standing at his usual post at the side of the reception desk, hand in the jelly bean container. She had just replaced the standard fare with a holiday mix of red, green, white Jelly Bellies. "I hear this year it's been held right after the Santa Claus Parade."

"Be careful," she warned him. "Some of those green ones might be jalapeño. And no, I did not sign us up for Breakfast with Santa, seeing as we would be the only childless table there."

"I'm surprised you're letting a little thing like that stop you," Jim laughed. "How else are you going to get your list to Santa?"

"I have my ways," she grinned. "Though I guess I could ask Juliet if we could borrow Stephen and Jon."

"That's quite okay," Jim interjected. "I promise I'll get you in to see Santa some other way."

"You don't like my nephews?" Pam pretended to be shocked. Though she loved the boys as a good aunt should, she did share Jim's feelings that those two were, well, a bit too boisterous - even for boys.

"Oh, I like them - mostly when they're asleep."

"We could sedate them before the breakfast," she offered.

"And that, Pam Beesly, is why Lackawanna County Children's Services is never going to allow you to have children."

"If only it were that easy." She laughed. "Anyway, we don't have to bother with the parade this weekend."

"No? Why?" Jim seemed truly surprised. "I thought you liked the Santa Claus Parade."

"I do, but what I really wish they would do was hold it in the evening. I mean, they light up the Christmas trees in the daylight - what fun is that?"

Jim chewed thoughtfully on a jelly bean combination of coconut and cherry. "Well, there are other cities around here that do evening tree lightings. Wilkes Barre's downtown square celebration is usually this coming weekend."

"I didn't know you were such a wealth of knowledge on local holiday festivities."

"Mark's family is all in Wilkes Barre," Jim explained. "So I've seen my share. We should go."

Pam's eyes lit up at the idea. "Oh yes, that sounds like fun."

Saturday afternoon was chilly and overcast when they arrived in the public square. There were three large Christmas trees erected close to each other in the center of the open area in front of the courthouse, each heavily decorated with giant shiny baubles and gold ribbons. Strings of lights were draped everywhere still awaiting the power to be turned on to start their glow, and Pam hadn't stopped smiling since they got out of the car.

"It looks like the tree lighting is going to be done before it's good and dark," Jim said as he read the flyer a volunteer handed him.

"That's okay, It's already nearly three, and with all this cloud cover it's going to feel like night." Pam hugged his arm tight. "This was such an great idea. Thanks for bringing me here."

"You don't have to sound so surprised. I don't know what you've heard but I'm hardly the Grinch," he teased her. "I wanted to be here, too."

"I know," she nodded. "I guess I'm still getting my head around the idea that we really are spending this year together." Jim pulled her against a building and out of the flow of people wandering around the various food stands and craft vendors.

"Just the first of many years," he said seriously. Before they'd left his apartment today Jim had slipped the engagement ring into a black velvet pouch so he could carry it less conspicuously in the front pocket of his jeans. As he looked at Pam, her cheeks flushed from the cold and her eyes glistening with excitement, it took everything he had not to pull it out and propose right there. "And I want them all to be perfect for you."

"Not perfect for me," she replied. "Perfect for us."

"Okay," he nodded. "Perfect for us." They exchanged a quick kiss, and then one more.

"You know what would be perfect for us right now?" Pam asked.

"What?"

"Funnel cakes."

Jim laughed and pulled her close. "My thoughts exactly."

They wandered around the downtown streets, sharing food and drinks and holding hands whenever possible. Jim bought Pam a glass Christmas ornament from an artisan, and they debated the merits of having a Christmas tree at her apartment or his, or maybe even both. The ringing of church bells from St. Stephen's were soon filling the air, the cacophony a reminder that the lighting ceremony was about to begin. Pam cuddled up against him as the mayor took to the stage to read a prepared speech, and Jim kissed Pam's temple and nuzzled his face into her hair.

The feedback from the microphone made the mayor's words garbled, but it wasn't as if Jim was listening anyway. He was trying to decide if he should walk her up to the lit trees and then propose, or maybe walk around the trees first, then back up to the courthouse steps and have them sit there, then propose. He felt a shiver that had nothing to do with the cold, and the reality hit him: I am really going to do this. Tonight. Finally.

The sound of polite applause brought Jim's attention back to the ceremony and he hugged Pam tighter as she excitedly counted down with the rest of the crowd. At zero the mayor flipped a big switch a councilman had presented him, and the multicolored lights all along the square came to life. A high school band started playing Jingle Bells, and Pam stood up on her tiptoes to kiss his cheek.

"I love you," she said, her voice hardly loud enough to be heard over the band.

He reached for her hand and placed a kiss on the back of it, even though it was wrapped in a pink woolen glove. "Let's get a closer look at the trees," he said.

They were strolling toward the Christmas trees when a deafening crackling sound was heard. The band ceased playing and everyone in the square looked to find the source of the noise. It was like the sound of a gun shot, or a close bolt of lightening. Then it was heard again and a commotion sprung up on the platform where the the mayor had just been standing.

It would be explained later, after a full investigation by the Wilkes Barre Fire Department, that the lighting switch made for the mayor had been improperly grounded, and it was that connection that caused the sparks that ran across the electrical lines that would eventually start the fire that burned all three Christmas trees down. Fortunately the officers on the scene had cleared everyone out of the square so fast that no one was injured. But at the time all Jim Halpert knew was that the elaborately decorated pine trees were not the only things going down in flames, and the only person who would truly appreciate the insanity of the situation was the very woman he couldn't yet let in on the secret.


	4. New Year's Eve

Pam stopped dead in her tracks as soon as she walked through the doors. "Tell me again what you had to do to get this place?"

Jim laughed at Pam's expression of wonder. "Hey, just because I turned down the corporate job doesn't mean Wallace still doesn't like me." His hand rested against the small of her back as he walked her over to the love seat. He tipped the staff member who had placed their suitcase in the bedroom, then sat down next to Pam. "I mean, there are still perks for being part of Dunder Mifflin management."

Pam was unable to tear her eyes away from the floor to ceiling windows that ran along one whole side of the room. "Yeah maybe," she finally said, "but I'm pretty sure it was not your position as Assistant Regional Manger to Dunder Mifflin Scranton that let us in here." She turned back to face him, a mischievous sparkle in her eye. "You didn't do anything illegal did you?"

"Not yet," he grinned, pulling her in for a kiss, "but we just got here."

She was right of course. Jim hadn't had a chance in hell of getting use of the Dunder Mifflin corporate penthouse on his own name or title. But fortune had smiled upon him under the guise of David Wallace, the company's CEO. Wallace wasn't someone Jim would have spotted for a fairy godmother (or godfather, for that matter), but at this point Jim was willing to take all the help he could get in finally finding a perfect way to propose to Pam.

Jim was truly depressed in the days that followed his last attempt. The disaster at the Christmas tree lighting had caused Jim to despair that he'd ever get his chance. He was only able to shake off his dark mood because Pam put so much effort into reminding him over all of Thanksgiving weekend how grateful she was to have him in her life. It was impossible for Jim to feel down when he was being smothered in that much true affection. He felt the nudge to not give up from other sources as well. Every time he saw how happily engaged Pam's sister and Benjamin were, random wisps of envy weaved through his heart.

It wasn't that he didn't want to give her the ring. He was dying to give her the ring. It just mattered so much that he do it in a special place, in a special way. She deserved that. So he tried to take a step back and analyze what had happened during the previous three attempts. He could see that everything that had gone wrong the last three times were due to elements that had been out of his control. From interruptions by people at the wrong place and wrong time to freak disasters, Jim thought if he could put themselves in a situation where nothing or no one could interrupt them he could finally get his chance.

His first decision was that he needed to get her out of Scranton. Take her somewhere nice, somewhere it could just be the two of them. Maybe get away for the weekend at a resort or hotel. He immediately ruled out anywhere near the Poconos, because he always associated that entire mountain range with the time Pam went there with Roy. The Catskills were rejected as well, mostly because they were too near the Poconos. That's when he started to think about maybe going somewhere more cosmopolitan, maybe somewhere like New York.

A weekend stay in New York City might just be perfect, he thought. There were so many things they could do, yet still be anonymous among the millions of other people there. He knew Pam would be open to just about any idea he had. They could take in museums or art galleries, or he could suggest the most ridiculous, touristy things to do and Pam would have the same sense of excitement he had about the city. It was a far cry from the slightly jaded familiarity that Karen had expressed, and in thinking of Karen wondered how he could have let himself be blinded for so long. The association he now automatically made between Karen and being in Manhattan was the one thing that nearly talked him out of that destination, until that email from David Wallace at the beginning of December changed his mind.

"I know it's been a while since we last spoke," Wallace had written, "but there are some new opportunities opening up down here and I can't help but think we could really use you. What would it take to lure you down here?"

Jim was flattered but he replied without a moment's hesitation. His life was in Scranton, and for now that was enough. Wallace responded soon afterwards, and as the messages passed between the two men, the tone shifted from professional offers to friendly exchanges and advice. Jim had felt an unexplainable connection to Wallace ever since the night they snuck out to play basketball at the company cocktail party, and when their email conversation turned at last to 'The Story of Pam,' he found Wallace to be a surprisingly sympathetic ear.

Maybe that's why Jim only hesitated slightly when he emailed David Wallace the next week, asking for suggestions on where he should in the city if he planned on being there with Pam for New Year's Eve. Where he'd suggest as the best place to stay if Jim just so happened to be thinking of proposing to her. Within ten minutes of sending his email, Wallace had him on the phone, saying nothing would make him happier than if Jim would let him make all the arrangements.

Which is how Jim and Pam ended up in the Dunder Mifflin penthouse suite making out on the velvet love seat at eleven o'clock in the morning on the last day of the year for 2007. They might have spent the rest of the day like that had the telephone not interrupted them about fifteen minutes into their lovemaking. As Jim stood up and went for the phone, Pam started rebuttoning her blouse and walked over to the windows. She discovered to her delight that there was a sliding glass door, and passed that door, a balcony that overlooked Central Park. Despite the chill of the December day, she couldn't resist heading out and taking in the view.

Jim joined her on the balcony. "That was the concierge. Apparently David Wallace not only got us this place, he also arranged for dinner at the Rainbow Room for eight o'clock."

"Wow," Pam marveled. "What is the special occasion?"

Jim bit back a smile and shrugged. "It's New Year's. He knew I wanted to make sure we started 2008 off right."

Pam wrapped her arms around his waist. "We're together," she sighed. "How could it not be starting off right?"

They spent most of their day exploring The Museum of Modern Art, where they could be found taking long, lingering breaks over coffee and fine pastries in the museum's cafes between the times they wandered the galleries. When they were taking in the exhibits, Jim found himself staring at Pam more than anything on the wall or on a pedestal. She just glowed with happiness as they walked around, and they found themselves giggling over the slightest provocation.

"We are going to get ourselves thrown out of here," Pam whispered, trying with great difficulty to stop laughing.

"Speak for yourself," Jim corrected her. "I'm not the one that nearly ran into that boulder suspended from the ceiling."

"That was _Medusa's Head_, and it was your fault for distracting me."

"Whatever. We should get a miniature one on a key chain or something as a souvenir."

At which point the giggles began in earnest yet again. Jim couldn't remember the last time he'd had so much fun at a museum. He had high hopes that today was the day things were finally going to fall in place. They stopped in the gift shop for a copy of the museum's highlights book and a set of colored pencils (no key chain versions of _Medusa's Head_, however), and headed back to the penthouse.

Once there they found a voice message from the concierge, reminding them of their dinner reservations, and asking that they contact his desk when they return for the evening as there had been champagne placed on reserve for their room. Since neither would be driving, Jim rang back and had the champagne sent up immediately. Another surprise from Wallace, the staff member handed Jim an envelope as he delivered the iced sparkling wine.

_I married my Pam_, the note read. _ Here's to you marrying yours in 2008. _

"What does it say?" Pam asked, startling Jim out of his reverie.

"Oh, it's just a note from David Wallace wishing us a Happy New Year," he said, slipping the note into his pocket. He quickly grabbed the bottle of champagne. "Let's open this up, shall we?"

A few sips of champagne later and the pair decided to take the bottle back to the bedroom. Their second glasses of champagne sat untouched on the side table as they instead turned their attention to each other. They were half undressed and fully reclined on the bed when Jim looked at the clock.

"How the hell did it get to be seven o'clock already?" He asked incredulously.

Pam sat up, at least as disappointed as he was. "I guess we better focus on putting clothes on if we're going to make it to dinner in time."

Jim lifted their suitcase onto the bed. As he opened it, Pam flicked on the light in the bathroom. "Wow, that's a shame."

"What is?" Jim asked.

"That we have to get dressed. We have a whirlpool tub in here." She stood in the bathroom doorway in nothing but her bra and panties and smiled invitingly. "Are you sure you want to go out?"

"Yes," Jim laughed. "It will still be here when we come back, you know."

"True," she sighed, sitting back down on the bed. "I just hope my black velvet dress is classy enough for the Rainbow Room."

Jim flipped open the suitcase lid and lifted her dress off the top of the pile. "You will be just fine," he assured her. "Now I better get a quick shave so they let me in."

"Oh, you don't need to do that," she said. "I like you with the stubble. I was hoping you'd keep it."

Jim pulled out his suit and laid it on the bed. "I'll just do it for dinner and then I'll let it go until we have to go back to work on Wednesday, okay?" Jim shifted around the other clothes in the suitcase, looking for his black shaving bag.

"Really, you don't need to bother," Pam said. "You look just fine."

Jim frowned as he continued to sift through the suitcase. He clearly remembered putting his shaving bag in there, but damned if he could see it. This fact was starting to stress him out, because he had something much more important than just his electric razor in the bag. Since he had expected them to share a suitcase for such a short trip, he has hidden Pam's engagement ring in that shaving bag.

"Do you see my shaving bag anywhere?" he asked, trying not to sound as anxious as he felt.

"Um, no," Pam said slowly. "And you aren't going to find it, either."

Jim froze. "What do you mean?" He asked, keeping his voice carefully neutral.

Pam smiled, albeit a bit guiltily. "Remember how I mentioned this morning that I really was hoping you wouldn't bother to shave this trip?"

"Yes." Jim already knew he didn't like where this was going.

"Well, I kind of left your shaving bag at home. Accidently on purpose."

Jim was certain his heart stopped beating in that moment. He felt it stop, and then he felt it fall through his chest and onto the floor. "You what?" His voice was barely more than a whisper.

Pam could see he was upset. "I'm sorry," she said, standing up and walking over to him, "I figured if you didn't have your shaver, you couldn't shave. I didn't think it would be that big of a deal."

Jim had no idea what to do, what to say, what to think. "I need to use the bathroom," he said brusquely, walking past her and closing the door behind him. He sat on the edge of the tub, and rested his head in his hands. He was about as close to crying as he had been in a long time. _How could she have done that?_ He thought miserably. _What the hell was she thinking?? _

This was it. As far as Jim was concerned, the whole evening was ruined. All the trouble David Wallace had gone to for him completely wasted. What in the hell was he going to tell the guy when he asked how it had gone? He was grateful that at least he had refrained from telling Wallace about the three other missed opportunities. He felt enough like a failure without anyone else knowing how impossible it was for him to sort out a simple marriage proposal.

He must have been in the bathroom for for nearly ten minutes when he heard a timid knocking on the door. Now came his second problem - how was he going to explain how he was acting? Who in their right mind would be this upset over leaving a shaver behind?

The bathroom door opened slowly, and Pam stuck her head it. "Are you okay?"

Jim rubbed his hands across his face. "Yeah, I'm okay."

She took another step into the bathroom. "I am so sorry if I upset you by leaving your things behind. I understand if you are mad at me. I had no right to do that."

Jim looked up at her. When he saw the look of genuine distress on her face, it reminded him of what really was important about that night. "It's fine," he said, standing up to reach for her. "I'm not angry with you."

Pam hugged him tightly. "I am really so sorry. I was just being silly..."

"Shh," he replied, kissing the top of her head. "It's not a big deal. There will always be another time. Let's get dressed and celebrate this new year."


	5. All in Good Time

Jim nervously rattled his keys in his coat pocket as he waited for assistance at the counter of Boccardo Jewelers. In his other hand he held a small bag that contained the diamond engagement ring he had bought in that very store six months earlier, still tucked away in its black velvet box instead of on the finger of the woman he loved. After four disastrous attempts at proposing, Jim was starting to believe the ring was jinxed, and not in a way that could be easily fixed by buying a Coke.

Maybe if he just returned it and told them to just let him keep the credit on his account, he could find a way to propose without a ring, and then let Pam come pick one out. That seemed like a reasonable plan, and it was one he revisited over and over as he waited, but it was lunch time and it seemed all but one staff member had gone on break. As the minutes continued to tick by, Jim walked slowly around all the display cases, trying to decide what ring Pam might ultimately choose. He looked through every case at least twice before a tall, older man behind the counter finally approached him.

"I'm sorry for your wait, Sir. What can I do for you?"

Jim took the velvet box out of the bag and held it in his hand without saying a word. He gently opened up the box and stared down at the ring that was sparkling under the jeweler's lights just as brightly as it had on the day he first saw it. He knew the man was waiting for him to speak, but he was having a hard time coming up with the right words. He finally put the ring box on the counter and slid it over to him.

"I was wondering if I could get this cleaned and checked over. I'm afraid I've been holding on to it for over half a year and I want to make sure it's still in good condition."

The sales associate raised his eyebrow curiously at him, but picked up the box. "Of course we can, Sir. If you'll just give me a minute I can have this done right now for you."

Jim sighed and wandered over to lean against the wall. After seeing all the rings on offer and comparing them to the one he'd chosen months ago, he knew there was no going back. The ring he'd been living with since July was the only ring he wanted to give Pam. He would just have to figure out a way to beat what was starting to feel like a curse on successfully proposing.

Ten minutes later the gentleman reappeared and approached him, the ring box already tucked into a new bag. "It's still perfect," he said as he handed it back to Jim. "I took it upon myself to replace the velvet box, as it was looking a little worn around one of the edges."

"Thank you," Jim replied, aware he was blushing slightly. He couldn't help it, but he felt the need to explain why he still had the ring, though he was certain the man wouldn't care. "I've actually been trying to propose for a while now, but things don't seem to be working out."

Again, the eyebrow raised. "Does she keep turning you down?"

"No," Jim laughed self-consciously. "There always seems to be something that prevents me from even getting to the asking part."

"Are you sure you really want to marry her?"

Jim felt unexplainably miffed at the question. "Yes, of course I do," he replied, slightly more snappish than he otherwise might have been.

"Then quit trying so hard." The older man gave Jim a surprising wink. "Have a good day."

Jim frowned the whole ride back to the office. There was something a little too knowing in the old guy's attitude, something a little too smug that just rubbed Jim the wrong way. How did the guy know anything about his situation? If anything he needed to try harder. As he parked his car in his usual space, he grabbed the jewelry bag and stuck it into the pocket of his blue wool coat. He'd have to transfer it to his messenger bag before he left for work that evening, because sometimes Pam was the first to the coat rack at night and he didn't want her accidentally finding the box in his pocket.

The afternoon didn't get much better for Jim, as there was a mountain of paperwork to guide Michael through from their inventory counts of the previous night. As usual, harnessing Michael to sit still long enough to sign off on the appropriate paperwork was like herding cats, and as five o'clock approached Jim made the decision to send Michael home and finish up all the reports himself. Pam had enough practice writing Michael's signature that forgery seemed to be the lesser of two evils when faced with many more hours of a distracted Michael Scott.

It was nearing seven o'clock as Pam and Jim were putting the final touches on the inventory reports. They were seated across from each other at the conference table, and as they each double checked numbers and signatures Jim would occasionally look up to find Pam looking at him.

"What's the matter?" he finally asked.

"Are you mad at me?"

Jim stopped working. "No, of course not. Why would I be mad at you?"

"I don't know, that's why I'm asking." she said softly. "You just seem - I don't know - like something's bothering you. You've been this way for a little while now so I thought I should ask."

He knew there would be times like this when her ability to read him so well would not always be an asset. He ran his hand through his hair. "No, I've nothing to complain about in regards to you," he gave her a small smile. "I guess I've just been tired, and all this grey weather hasn't been helping. I'm sorry if I've inadvertently been taking it out on you."

She shook her head. "You haven't. Not yet anyway," she grinned. "I guess maybe you should start getting to bed a little earlier then, huh?"

Jim felt his mood lifting with her teasing. "I think it's all the going to bed that's part of the reason I'm so tired," he replied, turning his attention back to signing documents.

"Wow," Pam laughed. "Well, there's no reason you can't go home and sleep in your own bed and I'll go home to mine if that's how you feel about it."

"That's not going to help either."

"And why's that?"

"Because I would just be lying there wondering what you were doing."

"Which is probably what I'd be doing too."

"So that's hardly useful," Jim replied. "Hey, how many more sheets do you have to sign?"

"Just these three," she said, holding them up. "Does that mean we are almost finished?"

"It does indeed."

"Excellent. We can finish this up and then I'll take you home and make you some dinner. You can just be lazy for the rest of the night."

Jim smiled. "You haven't exactly had an easy day of it either. I thought in times like these we just split the difference and order in pizza."

"I don't mind looking after you. I can tell you've been bit down lately."

"Thanks," he replied, brushing his hand against hers as he stacked up the last of the reports. "But you don't have to."

"I know I don't have to," she replied, her hand reaching for his. "That's why I want to."

Jim stood up and walked around to her side of the table, pulling her up and into a hug. After a few minutes Pam took a step back. "Come on, Assistant Regional Manager. Let's put this stuff in an envelope so we can get out of here."

Jim was on his way back from the men's restroom when he saw that Pam had stacked the mail on the reception desk and was reaching for their coats. He realized that he had forgotten to take the ring out of his coat as the small bag fell out of his pocket and landed squarely at Pam's feet, the box almost comically rolling out.

Jim froze for the moment, wondering what he was going to do. It was quite clearly the box for a piece a jewelry. For a ring, or maybe earrings. But certainly not something easily explained away as nothing. And even if she somehow couldn't guess it was a gift box, the brown plastic bag with the name Boccardo Jewelers in gold letters made it hard to deny its origins.

Pam handed Jim his coat and then bent down to pick up the bag in one hand, and the velvet box in the other. Her eyes asked a hundred questions, or maybe it was just the same question hundreds of times. But she said nothing, and putting the velvet box delicately back in the bag she handed it to Jim.

"This fell out of your pocket," she said quietly.

"Thank you," he replied just as softly, completely lost for words. He held the bag in his hand, just staring down at it as if it would tell him what he should do next. He watched as she turned toward the coat rack again, this time taking her coat down and starting to put it on. Her silence told him that she had to know what the bag held, what was in that box. But this wasn't at all the way he ever expected to tell her about it.

Jim leaned back against his desk, feeling utterly exhausted. He dropped his coat on his desk, while still holding on to the bag holding the engagement ring. Pam had finished putting on her coat and reached for the envelopes when she noticed he was still at his desk.

"Are you okay?" she asked. She took a step toward him as he finally looked up at her. He knew he had to tell her. He so wanted to tell her. He'd been carrying around so much for so long, and he'd finally reached the breaking point.

He pulling the velvet box out of the bag, dropping the bag on top of his coat. He held the ring box tightly in his hand. He ran his free hand through his hair once again. "I need to sit down I think," he said, walking toward the grey couch. "Is that okay if we just sit for a minute?"

Pam put the envelopes back down on the counter. "Of course it is," she replied, taking off her coat and laying it down on his. She tucked her one leg under her as she sat down next to him, turning to face him. Jim sat hunched over, his elbows on his knees and his hands clasped around the box.

"Do you want to know how long ago I bought this?" He asked, his head turned to see her face.

Pam's eyes never wavered from his. "How long?"

"Six months." He replied, his gaze returning to the box. "I bought it on July third of last year, and today's what? January eighteenth? So over six months, actually."

Pam said nothing, her hand simply resting against his thigh. He looked up at her again. "You know what's in this box, don't you?"

"No," she said simply.

Jim sat up a bit straighter. "Really? You have no idea?"

"I know what I'd like it to be," she said, "but I can't see inside a closed box."

Jim closed his eyes and took a deep breath. He had never really doubted that she would say anything but yes to a proposal, but it was still gratifying to hear her encouraging, if teasing words. He wanted so much to finally just unload all the secrets he'd been carrying around inside for so long. He didn't like keeping things from her.

"Guess how many times I have tried to propose to you since I bought this?"

"What?" Pam asnwered, confused. "What do you mean 'tried to propose'?"

"Just what I said. Since I bought this ring I have tried to propose to you several times."

"Several?"

Jim couldn't help but laugh. "Don't sound so surprised. Or I don't know, maybe you should. Maybe I'm insane. But I've tried four times to give you this damn ring."

Pam moved her hand from his thigh to his shoulder, gripping it tightly. "Jim, what in the world are you talking about?"

"Pam," he mimicked. "I'm telling you the honest to God truth. I have attempted to propose to you on four separate occasions since I bought this ring."

"When?"

"Well, let's see. First there was Labor Day weekend. Remember when I left you on the swing and ran back into the house?"

Pam kept staring at him, but he could see that the memory was slowly coming back to her. "You went in the cabin to get the ring?"

Jim nodded. "Only to come out to find that Benjamin had been just that much quicker."

"Oh my God," Pam said slowly, her hands covering her mouth. "No."

Jim nodded. "Yes."

"Oh my God," she said again, her hands moving to rest on his forearm. "I am so sorry."

Jim shrugged. "How could you have known?"

She rested her head against his shoulder. "Oh, you poor thing. How awful. I wish I had known."

"Well, I just brushed that first one off - figured I'd get another chance to ask you."

"When did you try again?"

"That afternoon at the corn maze."

"The employee night?"

Jim nodded. "I was all set to ask you when Dwight and Michael started shouting for us."

Pam let out a giggle.

"It's not funny, Pam." But Jim couldn't help but crack a smile as he chastised her.

"I know," she said, her head still against his shoulder. "But what were you thinking with those two anywhere near?"

"I can see that now," he replied. "But trust me, at the time it seemed like a great idea."

"I'll have to take your word for that," she giggled again.

"Nice, mock my pain."

She kissed his cheek. "What happened next?"

"Oh God," Jim groaned even now at the memory. "Attempt number three you will be able to guess with three simple words: burning Christmas trees."

Pam leaned back, her eyes as wide as saucers. "No!"

Jim nodded. "Yep. I have to admit that one is probably my personal favorite. I mean, if you are going to have your proposal plans hijacked -"

Pam doubled over in laughter. "I can imagine," she gasped between laughs. "I know I'll never forget that night and I had no idea of your plans. That's just too funny, Jim."

"I am so glad this amuses you. I was traumatized!" He couldn't help but join in her laughter.

Pam took a deep breath and wiped her eyes. "So there was one more?"

"Yeah," he replied. "And the fault for that one lies solely on your head. It was all going perfectly and you ruined it."

"I did?" Pam sat up straighter. "What did I do?"

"You thought you were being clever in leaving my shaving bag behind when we went to the city for New Year's Eve," he said softly.

Pam sobered up. "What?"

"You remember? You didn't want me to shave so you left the bag behind, even after I had put it in the suitcase."

"Oh Jim, no." She shook her head. "Don't tell me what I think you are telling me."

He held up the black velvet box. "Yes, Miss Beesly. This little box was tucked inside the shaving bag you took out of the suitcase."

Pam didn't much feel like laughing anymore. "Oh Jim, I am SO sorry."

"Yeah, you were sorry then, too," he said quietly.

"But I didn't know," she protested. "How could I have even known?"

He reached up and stroked her cheek. "I know. I don't really blame you. But I was shattered for a while when I realized it wasn't going to work out AGAIN."

"I don't know what to say. I"m surprised you just didn't give up on the whole idea."

Jim gave a single laugh, and leaned forward again, elbows on knees. "I went to the jewelry store today to return the ring."

"Oh," Pam said, and Jim couldn't help thinking how sorrowful such a single noise could sound.

"I thought maybe the ring was jinxed," he said. "That maybe I should just let you pick out your own instead of presuming I'd know what you'd like."

"Then what's that?"

He looked back at her. "I couldn't return it. I think I've grown kind of attached to it."

"That's good," she said, sounding almost shy.

"I hope you think so."

"I'm sure I will."

"Yeah," Jim snorted. "If we ever get to that point. Even after telling you all of this - which don't get me wrong, does make me feel a lot better - you'll forgive me if I won't believe it until it happens."

"What do you mean?"

"I'm waiting to see what next calamity hits when I try once again to propose."

"You don't have to wait," she said, her words painfully awkward, "You could - . Do you - ? "

"No." His answer was quick and resolute. "I am NOT proposing to you in the offices of Dunder Mifflin. I refuse. I can't."

"That's fine," she said quickly. "I just don't want you to think you need to make anything big out of this - You can't pretend you don't know what my answer would be."

"Are you serious?" Jim stood up, clearly agitated. "After everything we have gone through, you think a proposal should just be a throwaway occasion for us?"

"No, of course I don't," Pam bristled. "I can't even believe we are having this conversation, but since we are I think you are missing the point."

"Am I?"

"Yes, and if you'll just relax and sit back down here with me I will tell you why." They stared at each other in tense silence until Jim sighed loudly and sank down next to her.

"Thank you," she said.

"Go on," he nodded.

"Don't you see that I don't care where we are or what you do? If and when you propose, all I'm going to care about is hearing those words. You don't need to make elaborate plans because what's going to matter most to me is that you'd reached the point where you think marriage is our next step. Jim, you know me better than anyone. How could you think I would care how you proposed?"

"It should be a big deal," he said stubbornly, his voice slightly louder.

"And I'm saying I agree that it is a big deal," she replied, her voice raising in volume as well. "It's a big deal because you want to marry me - not because you come riding in on a white horse or even riding a jackass when you do it."

Jim did a double take. "Did you just say jackass?"

"I believe I did," she replied.

"I never considered the option of riding in on a jackass."

Their eyes met, and they both fought to look serious. In the end Jim cracked first, and soon they both were giggling like children. Pam put her arms around him, resting her head on his shoulder. "I can't tell you how sorry I am you've been going through all this. It's not supposed to be like that."

"Tell me about it." He pressed his lips to her forehead. "But I really need to do this my way."

"Okay," she said, snuggling closer, "Just make sure you do."

It was approaching eight o'clock when Jim and Pam finally made it out of the office. Jim was exhausted, but his heart felt lighter now that he'd shared his experiences with Pam. He lost the fear that things were never going to work out, instead surprised to find it replaced with a sense of patience that he would just know when the right time had arrived.

They had stepped out of the elevator when Pam gasped and ran toward the front doors. "It's snowing!" she declared and headed out gleefully. Jim followed more slowly behind, noting that there was already more than three inches on the ground, and it was still coming down pretty quickly. He was briefly glad they had decided to ride together, and wondered in what conditions they would find the roads.

He heard Pam call his name and looked up. Pam was standing in the middle of the nearly empty lot, her head tilted back as she tried to catch snowflakes on her tongue.

"You are such a dork, Beesly," he called as he approached her.

"You're just jealous because you can't catch snowflakes."

She turned to face him and for a moment it was like he'd never really seen her before. There was a fine sheen of snow clinging to her curling hair, and the floodlights over head made it sparkle like glitter. Her cheeks and nose were already turning pink from the cold, and the smile she gave him made him feel so warm he was pretty certain his coat was completely unnecessary.

"What?" she asked as he continued to stare at her. "It's just snow, Jim. Try and catch some on your tongue."

Instead Jim found himself pulling the ring box out of his coat pocket and getting down on one knee in the middle of the snow covered parking lot. He reached out and tugged on the front of her coat to get her attention.

"Oh, did you slip?" She asked, concerned when she saw him kneeling in the snow. She reached for his hand, but stopped when she realized what was going on. "What are you doing?"

"You are without exception the most beautiful person I have ever known," Jim began.

"Jim," Pam protested, "You are going to ruin those pants kneeling in the snow."

"Pam," Jim said a bit forcefully. "Please let me finish."

"Sorry," she nodded, her hands clasping together in front of her.

"And this is not in any way, shape or form the way I would have imagined doing this, but I can't stand here and watch you, watch you being you, and not do this right now."

He took another deep breath as Pam nodded again. "Let's face it," he laughed slightly. "I don't know how to love any other woman but you. Believe me, I tried. I tried, and I failed. You are it for me. I need you to spend the rest of your life with me." He opened the ring box, was delighted when he heard her gasp loudly. "Will you marry me, Pam?"

Pam didn't say a word, but he could see her eyes were beginning to shine with unshed tears. He waited a moment longer, feeling the cold, wet snow seeping into his pant leg. "Pam?" he prompted.

"That's too much," she replied.

"Too much?"

"The ring - you can't give me that!"

"I can, and I am, if you'll just answer the my question."

"Oh!" Pam exclaimed, the sudden realization that she'd not yet responded hitting her fully. "Yes, of course! Yes! Now get up out of the snow, you dork," she chastised him affectionately as she pulled him close for a kiss.

"Dork??" Jim protested as he finally stood up, although he had no problem kissing her back. "That's how we are going to start off?"

Pam's laughter filled the parking lot. "Yes, actually. Is that going to be a problem?"

"No," he replied, reaching up to brush some of the snow off her hair and shoulders. "I can't say I expected anything else." He reached for her left hand. "Care to try the ring on now?"

Pam looked down again at the ring and shook her head. "Jim, that's - that's just too much! I don't think I've ever seen diamonds that big before. I mean in person."

"Well, now you have." He tugged off her glove and pulled the ring from the box.

"It's too expensive," she protested. "How much did this cost? I know you must have spent entirely too much money on this."

"That's none of your business," he chided her. "Just try it on, okay? Can I just see how it looks?" He rested his forehead against hers. "Please? Humor me?"

She sighed and uncurled her hand. He slipped the ring easily on her finger. "Perfect," he smiled.

Pam stared down at the ring, sparkling brilliantly against the still falling snow. Pam gave a very unladylike sniff as tears starting to fall freely.

"Damn you," she laughed.

"What?" Jim smiled, wiping her tears off her cheeks.

"You knew once you put it on I wouldn't be able to resist it."

Jim nodded, his eyes dancing. "And I was right, wasn't I?"

"Maybe," she pouted. "But aren't you glad you didn't wait any longer for the 'Perfect' time?"

"Who said this wasn't it?"


End file.
